Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts
Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts

Monday, February 14, 2011

Dhiru and sons- a chapter in modern mythology

Dhiru Mahadev started his career as an employee in one of the many British companies located in the coast of Aden. Although a humble beginning, Dhiru was always poised for bigger challenges in life. A few years into his career he met the two people who would become his working partners in future.

The first person was Brahm Dev, a man of impeccable knowledge and research experience. His intelligence was supreme and people felt he thought with not one brain, but four! The other was Vishnu Baba, an operations expert who knew to keep any plant running irrespective of any form of trouble, be it from employees or management.

So when they formed their venture ‘Hind Reliance’, Brahm took charge of R&D and was responsible for creativity and innovation, while Vishnu took charge of operations and plant management. Mr.Mahadev, being the biggest contributor in the venture, was responsible for final goods delivery and overall decision making. So he was nicked ‘Param’- meaning supreme.

Param meanwhile got married to Parvatiben, a good looking woman with a strong Gujrati background. The couple were blessed with two sons. The elder one was Ganesh Mahadev and the younger was Karthik Mahadev.

Ganesh was born with a speech disability. He was smart but would not talk. This made him very shy and tied down to his own world of books and stories. Very soon his friends started calling him Mook-esh (‘mook’ meaning dumb in Hindi). Karthik on the other hand was a very handsome extrovert. He was inclined to movies and show biz right from a young age. At one point he felt that his name Karthik was so not reflective of his ‘modern’ nature that he re-christened himself ‘Anil’ after his favourite star in Bollywood Anil Kapoor.

As years went by, Dhiru Mahadev’s company became big and it looked like its employees could form a nation of their own. Dhiru would often quip to his wife, “Sitting in the twenty fifth floor of my office in Nariman Point, I feel like I am on top of some Kailash mountain and can see the entire world from a bird’s eye view.”

Mookesh and Anil went to the best school in the country and after completing their schooling in India, they were sent away for graduating in business studies from the US. When it was time for his sons to return after completing their graduate studies, Param found that he was a deeply worried and concerned man. He feared that bookish education in the US would be a handicap for his sons to run Hind Reliance. He feared that their decision making abilities will be affected by their Americanised perspectives in business, especially in a completely Indian company like theirs.

So he decided to test them.

One day after they were back in India, Param called his wife Parvatiben and their sons Mookesh and Anil to his study. There he was sitting with his close friend Mr.Narad Muni. Narad was a shrewd businessman who spent most of his life travelling across seas and shores for running his business. When they were ready, Param spoke.

“Sons, you are both very adorable, and we love you both. You have completed your education and have made yourselves eligible for bigger roles now. However, I would like to test you to know who among you is better suited at following me.”

“I have transferred Rs.1,00,00,000 to both your accounts. Now I will give you a maximum of one month to complete this assignment. Go and experience life to the fullest! Narad uncle will help you get your air tickets and all ready.”

True to their respective selves Mookesh remained sombre and unperturbed while there was a distinctive glint in Anil’s eyes. Within two days, Anil was cruising through the waters of Nile, while his elder brother Mookesh was slump on the couch watching Mind Your Language series on television.

Anil booked a Europe tour package that took him to the most exotic of places in the Europe. He cruised on the seas, went bungee jumping, yachting, rowing, and ice skiing and trekking through the Alps. He drank the most expensive liquors and slept with the most exquisite women from across the globe. He drove in the most luxurious of vehicles and interacted with many celebrities worldwide.

Meanwhile, his brother Mookesh preferred to stay indoors than outdoors. Much to the surprise of everyone around him, he went and joined Hind Reliance to help his father in business. In a matter of one week, he learnt the business in and out. By three weeks, he made Hind Reliance a profit of Rs. 50,00,000. Impressed by his effort at running the company, Param declared Mookesh as his successor.

When Anil came back from his tour, he was aghast to see that Mookesh had already been proclaimed winner in a contest that he considered uncompleted. Red faced, with a heavy heart he spoke to his father.

“Dad, you asked us to ‘GO’ and enjoy life. So I went out and experienced the best of everything in the world and came back. I learnt the best practices from everywhere and hoped to implement them in our company. But here I see that in spite of having not stepped outside the city, you have proclaimed Mookesh to be the winner. How unfair is that father?”

Param replied, “Yes, I asked you to experience ‘life’. By joining me at the company, Mookesh proved that ‘Hind Reliance’ was his life. What could have been a better reason to announce him as my successor?”

Not convinced at his father’s judgement Karthik ‘Anil’ Mahadev cried foul, vowed to never join his father’s company and walked out of the Mahadev family house.

Dhiru ‘Param’ Mahadev smiled. His wife Parvatiben cried. Their son Ganesh ‘Mookesh’ Mahadev looked expressionless, but his dreams sore high like a 60 floors tower worth US$2Bn in the heart of Mumbai city!


-Shyam

Monday, December 27, 2010

the lazy and the rich

This thought occured to me while I was boarding my flight to Mumbai today. So I thought why not blog about it from my mobile. So here is the attempt!

The two set of people who board the flight last are the lazy and the rich!

The lazy barely manage to reach on time while the rich get privilege treatment. And what happens in course of time?

The lazy manage to find easier methods to multiply money, and tend to become rich fast. And the rich get used to their luxury and turn lazy!

So they exchange roles, but still manage to board their aircrafts last!! :P

Cheers! :)

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

The story of my experiments with Pragyan


As a disclaimer I must admit that it is not just me but a small team of us who´ve done the experiment and everything bad must be hurled at all of us equally For the good ones... I am always there!


We worked towards Pragyan for almost a year and many weird and creative ideas were brought up in this course of time; while some survived, many never made it to Pragyan´10. And now that Pragyan is over I feel its time to let the cat out of the bag.

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1. Abhinav ka Swayamvar

Probably the most weirdo publicity idea ever in a techfest, but Pragyan was determined to gain a strong ground within the NITT campus.

Inspired by Sir Richard Branson´s strategies, and also ´Rakhi ka Swayamvar´ this unique publicity model was devised by me! With the number of female fans of the Pragyan ´chocolate-boy chairman´ growing by the hour, it was planned to have a one day reality show in EEE Audi or Barn stage challenging the girls of 2nd year UG to fight it out for a date with our KursiPurush.

But due to fear of excessive competition and predicted increase in the number of in-campus patients suffering from mental trauma (those who fail to win the challenge) the idea was called off based on the recommendation of WHO. It is understood from Opal that a bunch of girls had already started preparing themselves for the event and hence were mighty disappointed at its cancellation.

2. Controversies and Conspiracies

In our attempt to devise a new scheme for ´effective publicity´ Mradul and I came up with this idea of publicising through controversies. The possible controversies we thought of included,

a. Hacking into a secured server and mailng the pragyan participants,
b. Being the first to release a controversial news (´The Almighty´ style),
c. Writing a controversial book on the flaws in the college education system of the country,
d. Bringing down a very controversial speaker to the campus and make him talk on something very very infalmmatory,
e. Demanding a separate statehood for NIT Trichy and making Pragyan its official festival (holidays!!! ),
f. Joining hands with a local political party for joint youth operations ahead of Pragyan to ensure good media coverage.


Majority of these ideas were rejected on the grounds of possible criminal cases in the future against the Pragyan orgainsers and since our already packed schedule did not give us the time for the jail adventure, we had to call off ´Operation CnC´.

3. For the flyers

Pragyan is an international techno-management festival conducted in the area that falls in the landing zone of the flights that are about to land in the Tiruchi international airport. To capitalise on this Mradul came up with this amazing idea of writing Pragyan 2010 in big, bold letters on the road from CLC to SBI ATM so that the people on the flight will notice it and thus the participation for Pragyan will increase!

¨What an idea Sirji!¨

4. Vada Pav Stall

Since majority of the core members of this Pragyan have lived in Bombay and have at least once longed for Vada Pav in Trichy, a collective decision was taken to have a Vada Pav stall from Bombay during Pragyan. Arya, the head of Marketing team was forced to hunt for prospective vada pav sellers who could bring their stock to Trichy during Pragyan.

But this idea was dropped after the members of the marketing team failed miserably in explaining to these vada pav sellers the location of Trichy, which they thought was not a part of mainland India !

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These are just some of the many ideas that we thought of implementing in Pragyan´10. Of course there are these other ideas that were more serious type and which were actually implemented during Pragyan!

But who wants to boast about them ?!